Daunting......and crying

Today I received an email from Sue our CCI agency contact. She is in Haiti working and took the time to email our agency info to us. I like her already!!!! There is a client page on their website that gives you every piece of information you will need to do this adoption. I just kept scrolling and scrolling and downloading and downloading. I am so overwhelmed at this point I can't even think of what document I should work on first. It all seems very daunting, but I know the end product of piles of paperwork is a sweet child waiting for us to come get them in Ethiopia. I so wish this was a faster process. God is teaching me patience, I know. It just that the other night at dinner reality smacked me in the face. Darren said the blessing before we ate, he asked that if our child was already born-for God to watch over her and keep her safe until we are able to come get her. And if she wasn't born yet, let her mother be healthy and keep her safe for us. I lost it. It hit me that our child may already be waiting for us and I am wading neck deep in a pile of paperwork. I know God will give us our child at the perfect time-not my time. It's just so hard to wait.

I find myself searching blogs for families who have gotten their children already. The stories are so sweet. I cry happy tears for them. I cry happy tears for us, knowing one day that we too will post our "Gotcha Day" . I am such an emotional wreck. Sort of like pregnancy....but this is a pregnancy of my heart. Not sure if this way is any easier or harder...just different. I can't wait to meet my precious child........